Kumail Nanjiani is a comedian who acts on TV (Portlandia, Adventure Time, and Franklin & Bash) and hosts a gaming podcast with our very own Emily V. Gordon—listen for her delightful audio cameo in this, the latest advice-filled edition of AAGM.
If you have a question for a Grown Person, please send it to youaskedit@rookiemag.com and write “Ask a Grown Man” or “Ask a Grown Woman” in the subject line, accordingly.



























The Demi Lovato reference? I don’t care if he’s married, I’m in love with this man.
anaruizwriting.blogspot.com
Log in to replyMay I request Johnny Depp for the next Ask A Grown Man feature. Not that Kumail Nanjiani didn’t satisfy my teenage wonderings, but, you know. JOHNNY DEPP.
;D
http://rosieandthewolf.blogspot.co.uk/
Log in to replyOh my god that would me so crazyawesome.
Log in to replyYeah Johnny Depp..or like..um…Joseph Gordon-Levitt (uhg sorry I’m just suggestion that because he’s attractive so ignore me please) oh or John Green. OH or Isaac Marion. Pleeeeassse do Isaac Marion.
Exactly! I don’t know how “qualified” Joseph Gordon-Levitt would be but he’s just so cute it’s kinda insane I think I would die if he made a video for Rookie ughskdhgkj
Log in to replyPS every AAGM video is hilarious. How do you find such cool grown men??? This is beyond.
PPS: I was literally just about to fall asleep when I had a revelation about how cool it would be if Aziz Ansari did AAGM!
Whoooyeah I would totally die.
Yeah so Joseph or Aiziz (it would be cray)…
John Green would be so AWSOME, Beacuse JOHN GREEN. Also, he is really good at stuff like this. :)
Log in to replyI second the motion. But also, how cute is Kumail Nanjiani?!
Log in to replyOh, Johnny Depp. I think I would die. I would want to ask him if he could marry me.
Log in to replyahhhh one of my favorite “ask a grown man” :))))
Log in to replywho does he voice on adventure time?
Log in to replyPrismo
Log in to reply>_< I can't believe I didn't realize that after watching the first 2 minutes
Log in to replyWOW WHAT A CUTIE aw man i love prismo
Log in to replyI just saw kumail on portlandia yesterday. and now he’s on rookie! rock onnnnnn.
Log in to replyomg babenss i didnt even know that was a word and im in high school wowww
Log in to replyI am in love with this grown man!! I just laughed some tears out of my eyez. “…and then one day, you have like, creme brulee, and you’re like ‘What is happening?? How much of this stuff is out there?’” hahahha, so cuuute
Log in to replyThink the cake analogy is the first strain of the ‘plenty more fish in the sea’ adage that actually makes me feel better. Cake, simples.
Log in to replyi had the same issue with the jurassic park ride. it looked so cool and fun but then the man brought me down.
life is hard.
and i love his stand up by the way.
Log in to replyYOU GUYS. YOU. GUYS. When his wife was in the background all like “there’s not a “The One”???” and he was trying to defend himself to her I was DYING. I can just see her giving him the one eyebrow up face, like, “I better be the one or you aren’t gettin’ any anymore” hahahaha. Also, the creme brulee thing was a really good metaphor. I’m going to use it. But don’t hate on carrot cake. It’s delish.
Log in to replyI LOVE THIS GUY! His character on Franklin & Bash makes my life. Also, his advice is awesome.
Log in to replyThis is golden.
Log in to replybest. episode. ever.
Log in to replymore of Kumail, please?
i really like this guy!
Log in to replyHahahah I LOVE this video!! :D best advice ever.
http://fashiononfire.org/
Log in to replyKumail Nanjiani is Awesome. The Carrot Cake/Creme Bulee metaphor was just great. And is it just me or is anyone else now in need of a piece of cake? I’m thinking Chocolate.
Log in to replyYES!! I am desperately in need of chocolate cake with cream cheese frosting and a scoop of moose tracks ice cream on the side. And it’s not even 11am.
Log in to reply‘You might have lost your carrot cake, but your creme brulee is probably still out there’
LOL
and I was waiting for a shoe to come hit him from the background :D
Log in to replyHahaha creme brûlée :)
Log in to reply“the only thing that can drown out the sound of your peers mocking you is you making out with slightly younger guys”
i died….. :)))
Log in to replyOUR CREME BRULEES ARE STILL OUT THERE, good news you guys.
he is hilarious I’m dying.
Log in to replyHave you all ever thought of asking John Green to do one of these? I’m 100% sure he’d love it and give great advice.
Log in to replyYES PLEASE. I second this motion.
Log in to replyAHHHHHHHHHHHHH YES A+
Log in to replyYes!!! That would be awesome
Log in to replyThat cake metaphor, man. Now I feel like I understand life.
Log in to replyI love this!!! Perhaps one of my favorite ask a grown mans to date.
Log in to replyCan I just suggest John Green as the next grown man?
HE’S COMPARING THE ONE WITH CAKE!:D THAT’S THE BEST THING EVER.
Log in to replyI love how he thinks he has to explain The Matrix to us. Silly man.
Log in to replyMan, i wish i had a friend like this guy!
Log in to replyAhahaha! This is the best! I can’t separate him from Portlandia. All I keep thinking about when I hear his voice is the “Birthday loan” skit. That was too great. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9nTSQAmNHTo
Log in to reply~Caroline~
HE’S THE FUNNIEST COMEDIAN EVAR :3
Log in to replyThis guy is the bomb HE IS SO FUNNY ON PORTLANDIA YA YOU GO YOU GO
Log in to replythe pie talk made me really hungry so i ordered a pizza and i don’t know if i’m gonna regret it or not
Log in to replythe thin crust @ pizza hut is bad :(
Log in to replyi want chocolate raspberry cake instead
Log in to replyI love this commentary.
Hahaha I loved the pastry metaphor
Log in to replyPRISMO! Ahh he’s my fave. And I love Emily’s side comments haha. :)
Log in to replyWoo! I love the Indoor Kids podcast! It was such a surprise to see Kumail’s face on the front page of Rookiemag! Loved this. Thanks!
Log in to replyOMG i’d never heard of him before BUT HE IS SO AWESOME!!!! Can we please please please hear/see/read more of him on here? =)
Log in to replyI almost died at the Miles Kane reference. Loved this !
Log in to replyGod, this is so cute! I think it’s my favorite “ask a grown man” ever. <33
http://birdiewearsatie.blogspot.com/
Log in to replyI agree- he’s awesome!
Log in to replyOKAY I HAVEN’T EVEN WATCHED THIS YET, BUT KUMAIL IS THE FUNNIEST PERSON EVERRRRR. Me and my brother were watching when he tours around Portland, and we totally agreed HE NEEDS HIS OWN SHOW.
Plus, I don’t think I’ve ever laughed harder than when he was talkin’ about birthday punkin’ on Portlandia. KUMAIL 4 EVER.
http://psychedelicdaisy.blogspot.com/
Log in to replyone of the best aagm ever, guys, well done….
Log in to replyaw i love this dude he is so cute and good answers too. i would TOTALLY love Ryan Gosling to do an ‘Ask a Grown Man’ i swear he said he’s a feminist and he’d be super awesome gah
http://www.opheliahorton.wordpress.com
Log in to replybest “ask a grown man” ever
Log in to replyhe reminds me of my PE teacher except 38292X funnier
omg, this guy doe. Freakin hilarious thanks Kumail!
Log in to replyomg this guy looks like my ex im in loveee
Log in to replythis was flantastic
Log in to replyThis just made my life a little bit better, in a permanent way. This man is absolutely fabulous. It’s nice to know that Prismo isn’t too corrupted by the celebrity lifestyle. :)
http://alovearmy.tumblr.com/
Log in to replyOhmygosh the cake metaphor is the best. I can’t wait to find my creme brulé.
Log in to replyAlso, can John Green please do a Ask a Grown Man? that would be the best. Or, you know, Joseph Gordon Levitt would be pretty great too..
I’ve never heard of this guy before! he’s hilarious! best Ask yet!!!!!
Log in to reply“you may have lost your carrot cake but your creme brûlée is still out there” may be the best advice I have ever heard.
Log in to replyBabin’ is now my vocab word of the year :)
Log in to replyI read the comments before I watched it, and I was wondering what could possibly be that amazing, and then it was amazing.
Demi Lovato in glasses isn’t all that cute, though…
Log in to replyPressed play… “IT’S PRISMOOOOOOOOOOOOOO”
Log in to replyOh my god. Kumail is, like, perfect.
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